My life hasn’t been all sunshine and daisy’s but I know many who have had it much worse than I so its hard for me to complain or feel sorry for myself. I am very blessed and I know that God had a plan for me. He put different twists, obstacles and choices along the road for me to go down and so in the end we always have the final say….we have the option to make choices to make our path end however we choose. God gives us prompts…I could have chosen so many different options during my journey but I finally started to listen to those prompts.
Here is my story. So many people wondered what made me leave a career that I loved so much and dedicated my whole life too…well, here you go.
I was born on Christmas Eve in 1970. My parents were Virginia and James Barron. I was born in Dallas Texas and I had a brother who was 6 years older than me and his name was Mike. My parents divorced when I was a toddler. In those days, the 70’s, the girls when with the Mother and the boys went with the Dad’s. Being as young as I was I tell this part of the story from the stories told to me from family members. Jump forward..basically Mom, aka, Ginger, aka “Worse Mom” as i refer to her now decided she didn’t want to be a mom any more. So she left me. Like really left me. My father found me all alone in the house. No one really knew how long I had been left alone but from what I was told I was covered in feces and dehydrated. So after a trip to the ER… My father became the first male parent in Dallas county at the time to get custody of a female child.
Fast forward to 1973 and my Father married Charlotte Wolf. Not long after that we moved to Winder, Ga due to my Father being transferred with his job. Charlotte, who I consider my mom even though she didn’t give birth to me, was a dance teacher so it was not surprising that I started dance at the young age of three. It was never a choice… It was expected. But I loved it and I was pretty good. I spent every single night at the studio. Through elementary and middle school I would be at the studio from the minute I got out of school until 10 or so at night. That was my life for as long as I remembered. I didn’t know any other life. I don’t have many other memories of my childhood other than there was not joy. No love was shown between my parents or to me and my brother …or should I say no affection. I love you was never said in our home. Mom was very authoritative and demanding and very much a perfectionist and I never felt I met her expectations. And I still don’t. My memories of my father were just that he was very unhappy. Lonely. And he drank a lot. By the time we would get home from dance each night he was completely sloshed. And that was just the way it was. For many year.
Eventually it got to much for my Mother and she left. She moved out while my father and I were on a trip to Canada. No warning…no Goodbye. Just a call from a neighbor that said “hey, there is a moving truck in front of your house”. My fathers drinking became increasingly worse and I asked my mom if I could live with her…and she said yes. So I moved to Gainesville my sophomore year and attempted to start over. My father would not forgive me for leaving him… it was a hard time for us both.
So living in Gainesville was awesome. I made friends I will never forget. Mom was also having the time of her life. She was basically never there. Pretty soon she moved out completely and lived by myself for the remainder of my Jr year and all of my Sr year of high school. Some might think this is awesome and honestly i did at the time…but I now know that I was extremely lonely. I began a pattern that followed me to this day… emotional eating.
My Father soon married the person I called mom. Sarah Murphy Barron. They were both alcoholics but I am convinced this was all in Gods plan. Sarah eventually asked for help and she went to rehab… my Father refused….and then magically thru some encouragement or ultimatum, not sure which from Sarah… he also went to rehab and from that point on they were both sober until their deaths.
Meanwhile my brother Mike was battling his own demons. Even though he had an amazing family with 4 beautiful kids and a loving wife…he was following in my Dad’s footsteps. He was a full fledged alcoholic. Even though my parents offered him help numerous times…Mike would never admit he had a problem.
Meanwhile I went thru many dead end relationships. I was engaged twice but came to my senses thank goodness. I was completely devoted to and married to my job. That was my purpose and my escape. The ability to make a living to doing something that brings you so much peace and love and to be a part of kids lives from the time they are toddlers to adults was a gift and a privilege. I won’t go into all the ugly details about why my love for my job started to decline but I can say without any hesitation that it had absolutely nothing to do with the students. But the joy was being sucked out of me. It was a slow process…but it became increasingly worse year after year.
In January 2008 my awakening began. At the end of January I received the phone call that my Father had Cancer. He died in less than 4 months. Those 4 months were the most wonderful and most horrific moths of my life until that point. I got to know my Father. My sober Father…I forgave him…he forgave me. I became his little girl again. I saw him at his very worse… and we had the most wonderful conversations. During his illness I had began to go to church with him every Sunday. I fell in love with that Church and those people. I never had gone to church as a child so I was a newbie. This was one of the biggest blessings of that time in my life. His faith was so strong. He knew he was going to beat this horrible disease. During his illness my brother came to visit… I remember my Father begging him with tears in his eyes to get sober…to try… before it was too late… it was one of the most heart-wrenching conversations I had witnessed. My Father died soon after. I am so glad I had that time with him… that I got to know him before it was too late…but most of all that I gained a family. His wife, Sarah, and her children…the Ewing Family. The family that had always been there inviting me to be a part of their family…but I was always to busy. That was me ignoring God’s prompts. But not anymore. 🙂
The loss of my Father was the first real loss I had ever experienced. Meanwhile, a few months later the love of my life came into my life. Michael is my biggest blessing from God. Not long after this…. my brother succumbed to cirrhosis of the liver. He died at the young age of 49. This was the beginning of my journey. Each journey has a beginning, a middle and an end. This was the beginning… I fell into a deep depression. I began to drink … way to much. I mean way way way to much. I will spare you all the gory details…but I had lost my direction…. Sarah and the Ewing family and Michael helped me get my direction back. They were my angels who without them, I would not be here today. And I mean that literally.
Through a lot of reflection and therapy I realized that I would never be happy working at the studio in the capacity that I was. I had no vote in the direction of the studio and I knew i never would although it had always been my dream to eventually take the studio over and run it for another 25 or more years. But I was told that would never happen, so I had no choice but to resign.
So.. that led to my second Chapter…. I started completely over and I decided to pursue my second passion… animals and rescue. I’ve been working for Best Friend Veterinary Hospital for almost 5 years. I am the Hospital Manager and I will always be grateful to Dr Sue for taking a chance on me when she did and giving me this opportunity.
Now we are entering the 3rd Chapter…I am going back to college to get my BA in Business and honestly I don’t know what the future holds for me…But I have several guardian angels up above watching over me and as I keep listening to the prompts God sends me…who knows what the future holds??? I am excited for what may come and open to anything. As long as I have my husband, my family and our dogs of course… we have all we will ever need.